The
year of the monkeysThe
year of the monkeys
2007 is looking veeeery sexy for Winding Road Records, and it’s not down
to the thongs us girlfriends bought us for our Christmas presents. The release
schedule is bursting at the seams with red-hot disco dukes. We’re starting
in January with Rhythm Plate’s new EP. After that, we
have a very special release with the Lovebirds ‘Modern Stalking’
EP, which is exactly what we’re all about - in the same way that
Ron Basejam was. Then, there’s more hearty goodness from
the likes of Secret Stealth, Office Gossip, Schmoov and Vincenzo.
Music
From…what?
Boompty bumpkins Rhythm Plate have rolled back into town on
their haycart with some new tracks straight made from the countryside. Their
second EP on Winding Road, the cheekily-titled Music From Our Souls
EP, will be out in January 2007 and has certainly ruffled some disco
feathers. The likes of Chris Duckenfield, Atjazz, iDJ magazine, Still
Music, Keep On magazine are shouting from the rooftops about this one.
Some are going crazy for the Node Out track on the EP, some for the Silence
Is track…but they’re all amazing.
Living
for the City
Winding Road is teaming up with London's house radio supremos Latenitelounging
to start a bi-monthly night at London's supercool Clockwork in Islington. The
night is called Living for the City - partly because it's in that London place,
and partly cos of the inescapable beauty of a certain song Mr. Stevie Wonder
wrote. The first LivingForTheCity night is on Saturday 4 November, and there's
an impressive line up as you would expect. On the decks are the legendary Crazy
Penis, with backup from the Schmoov Djs and Rosko. As if that weren't enough,
Winding Road's own star Office Gossip will be treating us to a live set of his
trademark lush, pumping sounds. Visit livingforthecity.co.uk
for more details.
:::: SURROUNDED BY 4 WALLS THAT AIN'T SO PRETTY ::::
Dubble
D
Winding Road is keeping up the pressure with the release of a 4-track EP by
Dubble D called 'Bug Eyed EP'. The record is a fusion fizzing Chicago robo-funk
to disco hiphop and latino warehouse rave, and is a little beauty. It'll be
available on full commercial release at the start of November 2006, but aficionados
- keep your eyes peeled for promo copies doing the rounds very soon. Watch out
for your eyes your eyes, too - Winding Road's resident graphic design genius
Toan Vu Huu has done an amazing job on the sleeve. The bugs wiggles and wobble
and undulate all over your brain - click here for a preview. Visit Dubble D's
website here for more groovy sounds
:::: I'M BUGEYED IF I KNOW ::::
Nu
Groove
Winding Road winds down the, er, road on Saturday 7th October to play at one
of Birmingham's nicest underground venues, The Boiler Room. There won't be many
insipid American divas to be heard at this night though. Schmoov are Dj'ing
a selection of unreleased Winding Road material, including tracks from their
forthcoming album, and Office Gossip is playing his debut full live set. Very
exciting stuff. As if that weren't enough for any night-lurking head nodder,
Brum's finest funk machine the Bam Bam DJ's are playing in the bar. It's going
to be a killer night of killer tunes and we recommend your participation.
::: Birmingham, Nottingham, where's the meat? :::
Fission
Tripping
Our release for September 2006 is the Fission Trips EP, by Belgium's finest
musical export Spirit Catcher. Another one of our trademark 4-track EP's, and
as is usual with Tom and Jean, every one a winning combination of twisted future
funk and the best production this side of the Nissan Factory in Milton Keynes
(or wherever it is). Straight after being released, the EP went to the top of
the Beatport house download chart…and stayed there for 3 weeks. Now how about
that then? It also got charted and played by loads of trendy DJ's and was a
'recommended' single of the month in iDJ magazine. Check out the EP here. Also
have a look on Spirit Catcher's excellent website (click
here) to see where they're playing next. They are without doubt one of the
hottest live acts in dance music at the moment, as well as being really bloody
nice fellas!
:::: Fish and Chips, for the nuclear family ::::
Not…Toddy?
Chris Todd, known for being one half of Notts finest, Crazy P, has produced
another pearler of an EP for Winding Road. It's called the Slave To You EP because
Chris was once a slave to a local dominatrix and he is fond of the memories
which the smell of leather brings back. _To create a lasting monument to his
gimpish glory days, he's done us an EP of suitably discoid housey matter, which
is your typical Winding Road release. That is to say, pumping and groovy enough
to make you instantly shout 'YESSSS' but weird and wonderful enough to make
the deep house geeks check in their encyclopaedias whether this REALLY IS house
music. Well, it is. So there.
::::: If it's not Toddy I don't know what it is ::::::
Sonar
Yes we did have a lovely time in Sonar, even if Schmoov got all ready to play
in their amazing schmoov one-piece lycra disco costumes on the beach, only for
an evil Spanish thunderstorm to spazz it up at the last minute.
Well, in any case, a schmoov gig is a, like, holistic artistic HAPPENING. It is less about schmoov actually playing and more about schmoov laughing at their own jokes and annoying strangers and propping up the bar afterwards. So everyone got what they wanted and it was actually one of the BEST GIGS they never did.
Every cloud has a slivery lining and we clutched victory from the jaws of thingy. Aren’t we AMAZING.
::::: Everywhere we go, we always take the rave with us :::::
Winding
Road T Shirts
We are now officially branching off into the exciting world of ‘merchandising’,
after receiving numerous requests by loads of pale deep house geeks throughout
the world for Winding Road T shirts.
They look good, but probably won’t smell too good for long once you smelly creatures go out raving in them. They have built-in intelligent anti-rave material which stops you sweating and which secretes aromatherapy into the air around you.
Is that a lie? Well, yes. But they DEFINITELY are T-shirts. They work. And they are STRICTLY LIMITED - to however many we can sell.
All sorts of colour combinations are possible….and for £20.00 a shot you’re on to a winner. Watch this space for pictures and more details coming soon. We’re going to do exclusive MP3-only slipmats next.
:::: Winding Road male grooming kits will be ready for
Christmas 2007 ::::
Winding
Road compi-tition
After years of lying low, all dead cool and stuff, we are hard at work getting
ready to release a compilation album, to present what we reckon is the best
of our hip-shaking, bladder-bursting back catalogue.
But we can’t settle on the tracklisting. We keep arguing instead. Nathan Office Gossip says all his tracks should be on there, but clearly that would make it an Office Gossip album - a very dirty thought indeed. Rhythm Plate have their own rather interesting idea of the Winding Road compilation being along the lines of - Rhythm Plate presents….’Rhythm Plate tracks and other inebriated moments on the Wining Road’. Let me tell you about Rhythm Plate. They are so SELFISH. And all they do is MOAN.
Screw the lot of them. We want to reach out to YOU. Yes, you - the spotty deep house geeks who haven’t had a shag for 3 years. So drop us an email with your personal top 5 WR tracks which you think HAVE to be included on our label compilation.
All useful feedback-givers will be recognised by the Queen in her New Year honours list. Maybe.
::::: Rhythm Plate don’t really do ANYTHING except GO ON about being from the countryside and think they can LIVE OFF IT ::::
NOCTURNAL SKIN
Yes it’s true, another record is coming out on Winding Road. On May 8th,
Karu’s ‘Nocturnal Skin’ EP will be HITTING
shops….and SMACKING clubs - and PUNCHING your
friggin lights out if you’re not careful. It’s a new kind of music
called Aggressive House which we have made up to get in the magazines.
Deceptively, it actually sounds quite mellow and groovy, but with a good kicking
motion for the dancefloor. 4 tracks of lush sounding chunky house tackle, including
a remix by Rhythm Paste. They are trying to take over our label
and have sent us lawyer-letters demanding that they be on every release from
now on. What can we do?
Anyway less chatter – check it out [here].
:: Karu Nocturnal Skin is due out May 8th 2006::
RHYTHM PATE
After months of talking nonsense, Midland's anti-heroes Rhythm Plate are releasing a record on Winding Road. It's coming out at the start of March and it is going to be the end of us, I'm sure. It's called ABCDE E.P. cos that's all they can get up to at the moment; if you wait around for their follow-up EP it will probably be called 12356. They're not so good with numbers. The EP is marvelous in that one of the tracks features genuine Derby builders talking to each other about how rainy it is. That track is called 'Rain'. The other tracks don't feature Derby builders, and have different names too. But we're still going to release them - they're dead housey, and were actually produced by music producers. Check out their sensible interweb site on this number: www.rhythmplate.com
:: Rhythm Plate's 'ABCDE E.P.' is due out start of February 2006 ::
TWO THOUSAND AND SICK
Welcome to the new year 2006, which we designed on our computers for you. It's going to be amazing, but only for us, as we designed it with only ourselves in mind. Sorry about that. This year we will be mostly: releasing records by house-music-type people, so that sad geeks throughout the world have noise to listen to at home, for when they go on house music forum pages all night.
Our treats for this year are – Schmoov! “Taking Me Over”; Rhythm Plate “ABCDE” EP; Karu “Nocturnal Skin” EP; Dubble D “Down”; another Hot Toddy EP; a new Spirit Catcher EP, and a new killer from Office Gossip. And an album by Schmoov. And expensive holidays, yachts, fast cars and loose wimmin. Not forgetting world peace. If our software works anyway. Well, it never has in the past and everything we touch keeps crashing cos of all the dwarf porn sites we visit. Oh jaaa.
:: You know it. I know it. We're probably going to have another shit year despite all the hype ::
SCHMOOV LIVE - JUST
Oooh guess what? Schmoov played live at trendy Notts bar Saltwater on NYE and it was wicked. For all of you that weren't there – nerr to you – it were greart! It was basically on a roof in a shopping center (you Notts people will know what we mean) but it was still classy somehow. Probably because there were so many hairdressers and clothes-shop types there.
The fun didn't last though. After the party there was another party, and another, and finally everyone ended up looking gaunt and ill, and were seen sobbing on the mornings of 3rd January with their lives in pieces. We here at WR hope that you fared better on NYE and wish you all the best for your sorry lives.
Catch Schmoov playing their chromium funk-filled housiness soon to farmers at cow-shagging contests. It's deep. It's house. It's live. It's what yer mam would want.
:: Schmoov do actually play live even though they look like drained corpses ::
SCHMOOV SINGLE
Schmoov have got a new record out it is a Schmoov single, written by Schmoov. It's a really fine vocal track called 'Taking Me Over'. It features infamous Nottingham street singer and ex-pop star Donovan Whycliffe. While Schmoov can claim to have snogged a couple of spotty stinkers in random discos over the years, Whycliffe used to be Danni Minogue's lucky lover. It makes you mad what a bit of fame, talent and good looks will help you pull. Note that Whycliffe is not to be confused with that twat Wyclef Jean, who is in fact the devil. The Schmoov mix is snazzy and slick late nite techno soul, and on the flip there's a super sleazy Crazy Penis remix which twists it into an ululating downtempo classic. Listen to some ululation [here]. It's not sexual even though it's on the interweb and called Penis.
:: Schmoov's Taking Me Over' is released on January 9th 2006 ::
WINDING ROAD ENTIRE MP3 CATALOGUE FOR SALE
The interweb is an amazing mammal – it is warm, sweaty, and helps you to give your money to us, where it belongs. Yes, it is true. You can buy our music as genuine 'MP3 performances' on 'online shops' on your 'computer screen'. Like they promised yesterday, the future is here today, and not a second too soon we say. What's more, you can find unreleased (OK probably unreleasable) gems that didn't make the journey onto vinyl. Click [here] to be transported to our MP3 audio showroom where trained salesmen will rob you blind.
:: It's superhighway robbery ::
SCHMOOV! REMIX BRANDY???
Coming soon on French gentleman, bon viveur and WR friend DJ Shade's Polyphonics Records is Brandy, with a remix by our own late night gentleman Schmoov! OK, it's not the US R&B star, it's someone French who's nicked her name, but it's still worth having a listen to, as are all the Polyphonics releases. Check here for the link to the nice site and look out for release date. Other ones coming up on Polyphonics include Jimpster, Elmar Schubert and other nice things.
:: French labels are better than English ones but their farmers are more mental ::
SPIRIT CATCHER PLAY LIVE AS WELL
Spirit Catcher have been impressing everyone on the planet with their wicked new live show. They set 909s on fire and throw them at random people in the audience. It's really avant-garde and London critics with funny haircuts think it's the next big thing. Tom and Jean really aren't humans despite their euro-sounding names. They are in fact evil robots. But like the rest of us, they still like a good bit of disco of an evening. Following the excellent 'Outer Space' EP released on WR in 2005, Tom and Jean (who look like R2D2 and C3P0 in real life) are putting the finishing touches to their as-yet-untitled (what a great phrase that is) new EP for WR, which is called…..oh bollocks it's untitled innit. Well it's another 4 tracker and it'll make your ears bleed. Don't let them get away with it.
Their next live dates are:
:: Check out the supercool (and evil) Spirit Catcher website: www.spiritcatcher.be ::
SCHMOOV ALBUM
Schmoov once released an album – years ago – lots of people liked it. Schmoov couldn't believe their luck, so went to sleep for 100 years. Now they have woken up again and are getting in to the swing of the 21st century again. They have written some music to dance to, and we are going to release it in album format. They will probably go back to sleep again once this comes out so pick it up while you can, or tell your grandchildren to watch out for the next one in another 100 years time. Whatever...
:: We can comfort ourselves with the thought that Schmoov do not really exist ::
VINCENZO IN TENTH RELEASE SHOCKER
Our release for September 2005 was Vincenzo's 'What It Is & What It Ain't' EP. Vincenzo is renowned for his slick productions on labels like Dessous, Silver Network and Naked Music. He is also renowned for being an Italian stallion with an eye for the ladies, but that isn't really what you pale deep house geeks want to hear about…..well I sincerely hope not anyway. There's other web pages for that kind of thing, y'know. Anyway he's our friend not yours, go find your own.
Anyways, this was our tenth release, and we were happy indeed to have got to this truly glorious point. So we will be going on about it for years to come and even then it will have a feature in our 'news' pages. Get used to it. Now get ready for the next ten – we guarantee they will all be marvellous and make your disco fingers twitch as much as your wonky eye.
:: If Winding Road manage another 10 releases it'll be a bloody miracle ::